Well... I had picked the most submissive of the cocksuckers and planned to visit him today for my first m/m blowjob (first one of those receiving, that is!), but this morning, my wife surprised me again, this time by waking me up with her hand on my cock. So I did get a great blowjob, only from my true love, and not from some strange guy. Typing it out makes it seem stupid that I'd even think of doing something with another guy.
My wife was a little sleepy, so it was a somewhat lazy BJ, which made it even more awesome. She kneeled between my legs. I sat up enough for me to check out her ass in the mirror. She sucked slowly and steadily, using her hands on my shaft, and paying plenty of attention to my balls. I may have lasted 5 minutes, at most. I thought she might have swallowed, but then I saw her spitting my load into a kleenex.
After that, I had zero interest in getting head again today, especially from someone other than my wife. When I checked my email, I was relieved to find the submissive cocksucker had sent me a message saying he couldn't do it today. So I just let it go.
In the afternoon, I did "test" my plan for receiving head from a guy. I got my fleshlight flight, lubed it up and brought it to my office. Yesterday, I stayed up later than I meant to, putting as much porn (lots of pics and a few vids) onto a thumb drive. Today, I plugged the thumb drive into the computer, put my dick in the fleshlight, and stroked myself while I looked at pics, mostly of awesome female asses, but also some pics of women giving head in POV, cuckold scenes where the cuck is "forced" to suck the bull's dick, and some other assorted kink. I pretended I was getting head from a guy under the desk. It took me a long time to cum, probably 20 minutes or more (so much for lunch!). It was a solid, very pleasurable orgasm, but afterwards, as I imagined I had cum deep in a strange guy's mouth, I didn't feel that good about it.
I'm thinking seriously about just saying the hell with it. I get plenty of sex from my wife and I just don't feel good about anything else, even though she gave me the green light to have oral sex (giving or receiving) with guys almost 2 years ago (conditions: no emotional attachments, no kissing, and no telling her about any hookups I have).
I'm not quite sure why I suddenly wanted to get oral from a stranger all of a sudden. Maybe just because I've never done it? Maybe because I want to feel more dominant, and less submissive? Well, maybe I'm just playing the c-list odds. That's not what I set out to do consciously, but since guys wanting to suck outnumber those wanting to get sucked by 10 to 1, it seems that the best way to find a dick to suck is to look for someone to suck mine. That way, I'll get plenty of responses, and I'm largely in control of what happens. I certainly got plenty of responses to my "first draft" posting. If I find a submissive cocksucker with a big dick, I have a feeling he'll be OK with my sucking him off after he sucks me off. If I don't like the guy (or his dick), I just get a blowjob and move on.
But I think I'll skip the (likely unsatisfying) blowjob - and just Move On without it.
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Monday, June 23, 2014
Is it the season, or just us, or what?
It's a strange, intense time.
After all the great kinky sex with my wife the past few weeks, I was still somehow surprised by the last couple of days.
My wife delivered the first thrilling shock to me last night. I suggested that we go to the bedroom and play, expecting her to dominate me. When she tops, she usually has me rub her feet, then her back, then kiss her ass for a loooong time (sometimes an hour or more, almost always with at least a couple of farts right in my nose or mouth) before having me make her cum a bunch of times. Then she has me tie my balls tightly with an elastic cord. She asks for something to beat me with. I give her different toys, usually including a 3' whip, a crop and a slapper or a paddle. She beats me for a short while, and/or kicks/hits me in the balls. She loves to use the leather slapper on my face! Sometimes then she asks for "her big, beautiful dick" and I give her a harness with a strap-on cock ready to go. Lately, it's been Vixskin Johnny in a SpareParts Joque harness. My ass is always ready (cleaned, lubed, and pre-stretched) if there's a chance we'll play that evening. She puts on "her cock", I suck it a little and lube it up, put my submissive, smaller dick in a "slave tube" (lately, my Fleshlight Flight), and she fucks me (she's REALLY good) until I cum in the slave tube. If she doesn't have the energy to fuck me, she'll have me suck a dick, or kiss her ass, while I hump the slave tube.
I was expecting something like that last night when I suggested playing the bedroom. But that's not what happened.
Thrilling as that would have been, it wouldn't have been a shock. When she instead said "I want to submit to you; I want you to dominate me", THAT was a huge, wonderful shock. I had her put on some very slutty clothes (short wetlook skirt with no panties and a cupless bra), added a leather collar around her neck and a pair of handcuffs sitting on the bed beside me (she hates handcuffs). I told her she could keep her hands free if she was good. She said she'd be good. I had her kiss my feet, my legs, and my ass. Then I had her suck my cock, with no hands at first, then letting her fondle my balls and stroke my cock a little. Then I had her get her ass ready for fucking. She was ready in 10 minutes. I fucked her in doggy, standing doggy (making her do most of the work), missionary, then back to doggy for the finish. My mind was mostly in the here and now, just getting off on dominantly buttfucking my submissive wife. When my mind did wander, I kept thinking about doing what I was doing - but doing it to some guy's wife right in front of him! That thought finally sent me to the point of no return. I brought myself back to the reality of my big cock balls-deep in my wife's ass as I started cumming. I came and came and came, staying inside her ass until I was completely finished. Then, just to keep feeling dominant, I had her give me a foot massage and get me a drink afterwards. Then we snuggled until she fell asleep. It was fun and I have felt GREAT ever since!
The other thrill is a certain website I'll just call C'list. :) I had been on this site before, and had checked out the men looking for other men section, but for some reason I'd never checked out the casual encounters section. Which is probably just as well, but dayum! There are A LOT of guys on there in this area looking to suck dick, some of them very submissive. The guys who want to suck dick seem to outnumber the ones who want to get their dick sucked by 10 to 1 at least.
After my wife drifted off. I got up and stayed up for a couple more hours. I got horny again thinking about my wife's submission. I started thinking about the fantasy I'd had of dominantly fucking a guy's wife in front of him. I also thought about dominating a guy, of making him suck my dick on my terms. I wrote up a C'List posting, but just saved it to a text file instead of posting it. I went to bed and felt very close to my wife. This morning, I woke just as my wife was leaving for work. I had an hour before I had to start working, so I opened the post I'd written, edited it, found a pic I took of my cock not long ago - and posted it on C'List. This was about 8:30. By noon, I'd had 6 responses, all submissive cocksuckers wanting to blow me! Two of them are too far away, and one's too old for me, but the other three are close by and interesting. Now I just need to decide which one to start with - and whether this is a good idea at all in the first place. I'm trying to put myself in my wife's position and see if I'd object if I were her. Like if she wanted to have her pussy licked every day, but I got jaded if I licked her every day. So she went online and found a local woman to lick it for her sometimes. And maybe, if she found the woman attractive enough, my wife would lick the other woman's pussy, too. And then she'd come home satisfied and not tell me about it. She'd love me just as much, and want sex with me just as often. She wouldn't invite strangers into our house and she'd be careful only to hook up with women she found to be clean and trustworthy. Thinking about it just now, I think I'd be OK with that - but there's a fairly strong chance I'm rationalizing! And "clean and trustworthy" is more a judgement call based on appearances than a medical fact. Herpes, or other nastiness, could happen. Guilt could make things weird. Balance that risk against the benefit of increased satisfaction, and probably increased confidence.
Further thought required!
After all the great kinky sex with my wife the past few weeks, I was still somehow surprised by the last couple of days.
My wife delivered the first thrilling shock to me last night. I suggested that we go to the bedroom and play, expecting her to dominate me. When she tops, she usually has me rub her feet, then her back, then kiss her ass for a loooong time (sometimes an hour or more, almost always with at least a couple of farts right in my nose or mouth) before having me make her cum a bunch of times. Then she has me tie my balls tightly with an elastic cord. She asks for something to beat me with. I give her different toys, usually including a 3' whip, a crop and a slapper or a paddle. She beats me for a short while, and/or kicks/hits me in the balls. She loves to use the leather slapper on my face! Sometimes then she asks for "her big, beautiful dick" and I give her a harness with a strap-on cock ready to go. Lately, it's been Vixskin Johnny in a SpareParts Joque harness. My ass is always ready (cleaned, lubed, and pre-stretched) if there's a chance we'll play that evening. She puts on "her cock", I suck it a little and lube it up, put my submissive, smaller dick in a "slave tube" (lately, my Fleshlight Flight), and she fucks me (she's REALLY good) until I cum in the slave tube. If she doesn't have the energy to fuck me, she'll have me suck a dick, or kiss her ass, while I hump the slave tube.
I was expecting something like that last night when I suggested playing the bedroom. But that's not what happened.
Thrilling as that would have been, it wouldn't have been a shock. When she instead said "I want to submit to you; I want you to dominate me", THAT was a huge, wonderful shock. I had her put on some very slutty clothes (short wetlook skirt with no panties and a cupless bra), added a leather collar around her neck and a pair of handcuffs sitting on the bed beside me (she hates handcuffs). I told her she could keep her hands free if she was good. She said she'd be good. I had her kiss my feet, my legs, and my ass. Then I had her suck my cock, with no hands at first, then letting her fondle my balls and stroke my cock a little. Then I had her get her ass ready for fucking. She was ready in 10 minutes. I fucked her in doggy, standing doggy (making her do most of the work), missionary, then back to doggy for the finish. My mind was mostly in the here and now, just getting off on dominantly buttfucking my submissive wife. When my mind did wander, I kept thinking about doing what I was doing - but doing it to some guy's wife right in front of him! That thought finally sent me to the point of no return. I brought myself back to the reality of my big cock balls-deep in my wife's ass as I started cumming. I came and came and came, staying inside her ass until I was completely finished. Then, just to keep feeling dominant, I had her give me a foot massage and get me a drink afterwards. Then we snuggled until she fell asleep. It was fun and I have felt GREAT ever since!
The other thrill is a certain website I'll just call C'list. :) I had been on this site before, and had checked out the men looking for other men section, but for some reason I'd never checked out the casual encounters section. Which is probably just as well, but dayum! There are A LOT of guys on there in this area looking to suck dick, some of them very submissive. The guys who want to suck dick seem to outnumber the ones who want to get their dick sucked by 10 to 1 at least.
After my wife drifted off. I got up and stayed up for a couple more hours. I got horny again thinking about my wife's submission. I started thinking about the fantasy I'd had of dominantly fucking a guy's wife in front of him. I also thought about dominating a guy, of making him suck my dick on my terms. I wrote up a C'List posting, but just saved it to a text file instead of posting it. I went to bed and felt very close to my wife. This morning, I woke just as my wife was leaving for work. I had an hour before I had to start working, so I opened the post I'd written, edited it, found a pic I took of my cock not long ago - and posted it on C'List. This was about 8:30. By noon, I'd had 6 responses, all submissive cocksuckers wanting to blow me! Two of them are too far away, and one's too old for me, but the other three are close by and interesting. Now I just need to decide which one to start with - and whether this is a good idea at all in the first place. I'm trying to put myself in my wife's position and see if I'd object if I were her. Like if she wanted to have her pussy licked every day, but I got jaded if I licked her every day. So she went online and found a local woman to lick it for her sometimes. And maybe, if she found the woman attractive enough, my wife would lick the other woman's pussy, too. And then she'd come home satisfied and not tell me about it. She'd love me just as much, and want sex with me just as often. She wouldn't invite strangers into our house and she'd be careful only to hook up with women she found to be clean and trustworthy. Thinking about it just now, I think I'd be OK with that - but there's a fairly strong chance I'm rationalizing! And "clean and trustworthy" is more a judgement call based on appearances than a medical fact. Herpes, or other nastiness, could happen. Guilt could make things weird. Balance that risk against the benefit of increased satisfaction, and probably increased confidence.
Further thought required!
Saturday, June 21, 2014
Surprise, surprise...
So, I'm having sex with my wife a few of mornings ago. We're spooning, and I'm going really slow and taking a long time to cum. To my surprise, my wife suddenly blurts out, "Work that little dick harder, bitch! I'm fantasizing about a big dick inside me, filling me up. Think about a big, superior dick fucking me hard while you work your inferior little dick!" Sure enough, I cum within a minute.
The evening after that, I ask her if she wants to go to the bedroom. So we go. She wants oral, so I eat her to several orgasms. The first couple are intense. Usually, she gives me head after I give her head. But instead, after resting a few minutes in post-orgasmic bliss, she says she wants to see me "cum like a bitch" with my mouth on "a nice big dick". She asks me to pull out some dildos. She picks the Dream Dick, which is considerably bigger than mine. She says, "Yeah - THAT's a REAL man's dick. Suck on that and cum like a bitch!" So I lube up my cock, put it in my Fleshlight Flight and suck "her" cock, which she's holding on her crotch. She puts her other hand on the back of my head and shoves it down, making me gag a little. She tells me to "work that little dick" while I suck a nice, big one. She says she'd love to see me suck a real big dick and that I'd have to swallow, and do whatever else the "superior man" says, even let him fuck me if that's what he wants. She says she'd love to see me got fucked. She tells me she's going to fuck me ASAP. I cum almost immediately!
Unfortunately, we've both been too busy since then to hook up. I've been feeling submissive. I've gone on some sites, basically looking for dick to suck. But no dice, so far at least. Still, just putting myself out there, posting on the web that I want to suck dick, makes me feel REALLY submissive. I've also looked up some gloryholes within 1-2 hours of here, and I may visit one of them next week if I can work up the courage. A potent fantasy I've had lately is of finding a guy who wants his dick sucked, meeting him, discovering he has a big cock, submissively blowing him to completion - and then introducing him to my wife! Of course, what happens then is that they dominate me together and she only has sex with him after that. I just have to serve them in humiliating ways. Maybe they lock me up in chastity.
I have mixed feelings about all this. I want to dominate my wife again, and then see how I feel and what I want. I think I'm just going to let it happen, whatever "it" is.
The evening after that, I ask her if she wants to go to the bedroom. So we go. She wants oral, so I eat her to several orgasms. The first couple are intense. Usually, she gives me head after I give her head. But instead, after resting a few minutes in post-orgasmic bliss, she says she wants to see me "cum like a bitch" with my mouth on "a nice big dick". She asks me to pull out some dildos. She picks the Dream Dick, which is considerably bigger than mine. She says, "Yeah - THAT's a REAL man's dick. Suck on that and cum like a bitch!" So I lube up my cock, put it in my Fleshlight Flight and suck "her" cock, which she's holding on her crotch. She puts her other hand on the back of my head and shoves it down, making me gag a little. She tells me to "work that little dick" while I suck a nice, big one. She says she'd love to see me suck a real big dick and that I'd have to swallow, and do whatever else the "superior man" says, even let him fuck me if that's what he wants. She says she'd love to see me got fucked. She tells me she's going to fuck me ASAP. I cum almost immediately!
Unfortunately, we've both been too busy since then to hook up. I've been feeling submissive. I've gone on some sites, basically looking for dick to suck. But no dice, so far at least. Still, just putting myself out there, posting on the web that I want to suck dick, makes me feel REALLY submissive. I've also looked up some gloryholes within 1-2 hours of here, and I may visit one of them next week if I can work up the courage. A potent fantasy I've had lately is of finding a guy who wants his dick sucked, meeting him, discovering he has a big cock, submissively blowing him to completion - and then introducing him to my wife! Of course, what happens then is that they dominate me together and she only has sex with him after that. I just have to serve them in humiliating ways. Maybe they lock me up in chastity.
I have mixed feelings about all this. I want to dominate my wife again, and then see how I feel and what I want. I think I'm just going to let it happen, whatever "it" is.
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
Love, Hate, Porn and Sex
My love/hate relationship with porn continues, although lately almost all I've been watching is either kinky or amateur.
I've been thinking about a number of porn related issues. I don't edit myself much on here, so forgive me if I ramble a little (or a lot) while I "think out loud".
Lately, I've been overly obsessed with penis size, and I've included my wife in the obsession. She admitted that larger penises are a turn-on for her, at least visually in the porn pics and vids I've shown her. In real life, she's only been with three other guys, all of whom had much smaller penises than mine. But she's admitted that she might enjoy a bigger penis more and that she finds the idea exciting. Which turns me on, probably too much!
I've asked her several times to imagine a bigger dick inside her. I've even asked her to make fun of my dick! She's played along and had fun with it. I had her tell me: "stroke your little dick while you think about a big dick, fucking me deeper than you ever could, filling me up and satisfying me completely" and "make your little dick cum quick, bitch!" That was while I was kissing her ass and fucking her feet. And yes, I came right away!
I've prompted her to say mean things about my penis, like "why is it so small?"; "don't you wish you had a real dick like a real man and not a little prick like a little boy?"; "is it in? I can't feel anything.". We've pretended she has a "superior" boyfriend with a bigger dick, and that she's going to make me suck his big dick off and bend over for him in front of her! Basically, I'd pleasure him whenever she didn't feel like it, and I would submit to both of them all the time. And my "little pee pee" would be forever locked up in chastity! It's fun, but I've noticed that I don't feel great after cumming while we're playing those games. And I worry that she may take it too much to heart and start thinking less of my cock, and/or wanting to try a big dick for real.
I should probably be glad that so far she's refused to try any of our dildos, most of which are larger than my penis, inside herself.
I think these urges are because I haven't felt that great about myself lately. I haven't been successful at work, despite working harder than ever, and I haven't been working out as much (because of working too much). I feel weak and fat. Inferior. And the specifics are all things I've seen in porn, or variations on things I've seen in porn.
Like a lot of guys, the prevalence of well-hung guys in porn (not to mention the tricks they use to make the cocks look bigger), make me feel a little inadequate. In reality, my cock is 6.5" long, and 5" around. It's 1.75 inches across. All of the women I've been with have seemed to genuinely love it and almost all of them told me it was big, either the biggest they'd been with or one of the biggest. I have to buy larger size condoms. But I look at myself in the mirror and my dick looks tiny to me. I'm sure if I slimmed down it would look big again. When I was younger and super fit, I got super horny just looking at my body in a full length mirror! I know another trick is to trim the pubes...
Anyway, but all that's pretty dumb. I feel like I'm playing with fire for no good reason. My wife loves me, and I love her. Her libido is down, but that probably has everything to do with her overloaded work schedule and nothing to do with my penis!
I really have NOTHING to complain about, either. In a typical week, I'll have sex with my wife 4-5 times, including one session with penetration, a blowjob or two, and once or twice kissing her ass. Usually I make her cum with my mouth/hands once or twice a week, which is all she wants.
Yesterday morning, she gave me a blowjob. After I started fingering her pussy, she sat on my face. She sat up and stroked me instead of sucking. She pressed a lot of her weight onto my face, and fucked my tongue really hard. Her gorgeous ass cheeks were the only thing I could see and my nose was wedged firmly in between them. I smelled her ass with every breath! It only took 15-30 seconds of this before I wanted to cum. I put my hands on her shoulders; she took the hint and put her mouth on me, catching all my cum in her mouth and holding me there until I finished cumming completely. Awesome!
On Saturday night, I gave her a massage, then licked and fingered her to several orgasms. She was tired, so instead of strapping on a dildo and fucking me, as she'd said she wanted to do, she selected a big one and "made me" suck it while she talked shit to me. I had my dick in my trusty fleshlight flight. She said if she had a real dick, she'd always make me swallow. She told me to deepthroat her big cock and to "cum like a bitch" with a man-sized dick deep in my mouth. In just a few minutes, I did! And I felt just fine after the orgasm, maybe because she had told me she loved my cock and there was no mention of boyfriends or other things like that.
About 10 days before, I'd dominated her, slapping and spanking her (both of which she loves), fucking her face and then cumming with my cock balls-deep in her ass! I finally taught her how to prepare her own ass for anal, by using glass plugs (small, medium, and finally one the same girth as my cock), or course with plenty of lube. It was a turn-on watching her get her ass ready, and it went faster than when I do it. Next time, she's going to get herself ready before we play.
I hope that will happen in a week or two. I know she also wants to fuck me, which will be awesome, too. I've really got it made, haven't I? :)
I pretty much wasted a lot of money on a couple of expensive 'marital aids' recently, but I think I've finally learned my lesson. I've fallen victim to the temptation of "retail therapy" a lot over the years. Maybe it's also because of feelings of inferiority. Lately, I realized that buying stuff doesn't make me happy. In fact, it makes me feel worse after I realize that the expensive thing I just wasted my money on isn't as great as I'd hoped.
Cases in point: in the past month, I bought a SpareParts Duo harness, which is a strapon harness with two holes (one for my cock, the other for a dildo, for double penetration), and also I bought the Vamp Talula dildo (I got the large 7" X 2" version). I like both the items, but I'm no more satisfied than I was before I bought them. I don't know if my wife would ever go for double penetration, or it I'd really like it anyway. As for the dildo, it's pretty cool, but it wasn't worth $100+ and it isn't even the color I thought I was ordering. I thought "mocha" was lighter, but it's pretty much African, which means she'll probably never want to use it. Oh well. It's fun to play with solo, and if I've finally learned my lesson about retail therapy, it's all OK.
So less porn, less retail therapy and more love/lust with my wife. I think that's a GREAT plan.
I've been thinking about a number of porn related issues. I don't edit myself much on here, so forgive me if I ramble a little (or a lot) while I "think out loud".
Lately, I've been overly obsessed with penis size, and I've included my wife in the obsession. She admitted that larger penises are a turn-on for her, at least visually in the porn pics and vids I've shown her. In real life, she's only been with three other guys, all of whom had much smaller penises than mine. But she's admitted that she might enjoy a bigger penis more and that she finds the idea exciting. Which turns me on, probably too much!
I've asked her several times to imagine a bigger dick inside her. I've even asked her to make fun of my dick! She's played along and had fun with it. I had her tell me: "stroke your little dick while you think about a big dick, fucking me deeper than you ever could, filling me up and satisfying me completely" and "make your little dick cum quick, bitch!" That was while I was kissing her ass and fucking her feet. And yes, I came right away!
I've prompted her to say mean things about my penis, like "why is it so small?"; "don't you wish you had a real dick like a real man and not a little prick like a little boy?"; "is it in? I can't feel anything.". We've pretended she has a "superior" boyfriend with a bigger dick, and that she's going to make me suck his big dick off and bend over for him in front of her! Basically, I'd pleasure him whenever she didn't feel like it, and I would submit to both of them all the time. And my "little pee pee" would be forever locked up in chastity! It's fun, but I've noticed that I don't feel great after cumming while we're playing those games. And I worry that she may take it too much to heart and start thinking less of my cock, and/or wanting to try a big dick for real.
I should probably be glad that so far she's refused to try any of our dildos, most of which are larger than my penis, inside herself.
I think these urges are because I haven't felt that great about myself lately. I haven't been successful at work, despite working harder than ever, and I haven't been working out as much (because of working too much). I feel weak and fat. Inferior. And the specifics are all things I've seen in porn, or variations on things I've seen in porn.
Like a lot of guys, the prevalence of well-hung guys in porn (not to mention the tricks they use to make the cocks look bigger), make me feel a little inadequate. In reality, my cock is 6.5" long, and 5" around. It's 1.75 inches across. All of the women I've been with have seemed to genuinely love it and almost all of them told me it was big, either the biggest they'd been with or one of the biggest. I have to buy larger size condoms. But I look at myself in the mirror and my dick looks tiny to me. I'm sure if I slimmed down it would look big again. When I was younger and super fit, I got super horny just looking at my body in a full length mirror! I know another trick is to trim the pubes...
Anyway, but all that's pretty dumb. I feel like I'm playing with fire for no good reason. My wife loves me, and I love her. Her libido is down, but that probably has everything to do with her overloaded work schedule and nothing to do with my penis!
I really have NOTHING to complain about, either. In a typical week, I'll have sex with my wife 4-5 times, including one session with penetration, a blowjob or two, and once or twice kissing her ass. Usually I make her cum with my mouth/hands once or twice a week, which is all she wants.
Yesterday morning, she gave me a blowjob. After I started fingering her pussy, she sat on my face. She sat up and stroked me instead of sucking. She pressed a lot of her weight onto my face, and fucked my tongue really hard. Her gorgeous ass cheeks were the only thing I could see and my nose was wedged firmly in between them. I smelled her ass with every breath! It only took 15-30 seconds of this before I wanted to cum. I put my hands on her shoulders; she took the hint and put her mouth on me, catching all my cum in her mouth and holding me there until I finished cumming completely. Awesome!
On Saturday night, I gave her a massage, then licked and fingered her to several orgasms. She was tired, so instead of strapping on a dildo and fucking me, as she'd said she wanted to do, she selected a big one and "made me" suck it while she talked shit to me. I had my dick in my trusty fleshlight flight. She said if she had a real dick, she'd always make me swallow. She told me to deepthroat her big cock and to "cum like a bitch" with a man-sized dick deep in my mouth. In just a few minutes, I did! And I felt just fine after the orgasm, maybe because she had told me she loved my cock and there was no mention of boyfriends or other things like that.
About 10 days before, I'd dominated her, slapping and spanking her (both of which she loves), fucking her face and then cumming with my cock balls-deep in her ass! I finally taught her how to prepare her own ass for anal, by using glass plugs (small, medium, and finally one the same girth as my cock), or course with plenty of lube. It was a turn-on watching her get her ass ready, and it went faster than when I do it. Next time, she's going to get herself ready before we play.
I hope that will happen in a week or two. I know she also wants to fuck me, which will be awesome, too. I've really got it made, haven't I? :)
I pretty much wasted a lot of money on a couple of expensive 'marital aids' recently, but I think I've finally learned my lesson. I've fallen victim to the temptation of "retail therapy" a lot over the years. Maybe it's also because of feelings of inferiority. Lately, I realized that buying stuff doesn't make me happy. In fact, it makes me feel worse after I realize that the expensive thing I just wasted my money on isn't as great as I'd hoped.
Cases in point: in the past month, I bought a SpareParts Duo harness, which is a strapon harness with two holes (one for my cock, the other for a dildo, for double penetration), and also I bought the Vamp Talula dildo (I got the large 7" X 2" version). I like both the items, but I'm no more satisfied than I was before I bought them. I don't know if my wife would ever go for double penetration, or it I'd really like it anyway. As for the dildo, it's pretty cool, but it wasn't worth $100+ and it isn't even the color I thought I was ordering. I thought "mocha" was lighter, but it's pretty much African, which means she'll probably never want to use it. Oh well. It's fun to play with solo, and if I've finally learned my lesson about retail therapy, it's all OK.
So less porn, less retail therapy and more love/lust with my wife. I think that's a GREAT plan.
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Porn is Stupid! (a rant)
First of all, I'm going to bite the hand that hosts me - Google sucks smelly donkey balls in a couple of ways. For one thing, they've recently started contributing money to the American Legislative Exchange Council (aka ALEC), who are just plain EVIL and responsible for an outsized share of misery for regular people. More to the immediate point, for some reason, if I'm downloading ANYTHING, no matter how little bandwidth the download is using (currently less than 5% of my total bandwidth), any Google service takes pretty much FOREVER (in the 21st century broadband sense of the word "forever") to load. Sometimes things don't load at all. Dude, WTF?!? If I had a better alternative, I would drop them. I used to love Google, then I was irritated but still kinda liked them for old times' sake, and now I increasingly dislike them - but keep using them mainly because I've been too lazy so far to seek out a viable alternative. But my patience is not limitless and I hope Google realizes that there are a lot of us who feel this way.
Now that that's out of the way...
I love porn, don't get me wrong. But SO much about porn, and porn stars, is just plain STUPID. I know it can't be easy thinking up new ideas for porn scenes and titles. I also know that a lot of the things about today's porn that make me cringe - ridiculous enhancements (more on that in a minute), ridiculous body hair-less-ness, and disgusting things like incest porn - are huge turn-ons for other people.
So maybe I'm irritated with other people for having disgusting tastes. And as a fart fetishist, who also enjoys bondage, domination, submission, and being pegged, I realize the utter absurdity of my being disgusted by other people's tastes. I mean, if I don't like it - don't watch, right? And I don't, and really, it's all good as long as everything's consensual and safe and sane (etc). But Sartre was right when he said that hell is other people. Sometimes, they just get on my nerves and I have to vent. So I did. Thanks for listening, if you did - and a big FUCK YOU otherwise! (I keed, I keed!)
The body enhancements thing really gets on my nerves, especially because so many of the women who've deformed themselves in the name of "sexy" were so much sexier before than after. I'm talking about you, Rebeca Linares, Aletta Ocean and Black Angelika (among dozens of others).
Although...I'm pretty sure they didn't get fake boobs, bee-sting lips and/or ass implants (EWWWWWWW!!!!) to feel sexier; I'm sure they did these things to MAKE MORE MONEY.
I'm guessing most of the decisions porn stars make are made for financial reasons. After all, at the end of the day, these women (and men) are whores. And I don't mean that to be derogatory, just descriptive. They have sex for money. Hell, in a capitalist society, we're ALL whores in one way or another, aren't we? But be that as it may, I don't think I'll ever buy - or even watch for free - any porn by stars with ass implants, and I always prefer the pre-enhanced scenes from stars I love. (As I've said before, with only rare exceptions, female porn stars do their best work earlier in their careers, anyway).
So a special shout out of love and respect to all the fine porn stars who've chosen to keep their natural bodies, including those, like the super fine Annette Schwarz and Holly Michaels (among many others) who were blessed with big, beautiful boobs - but more especially to the super fine women of porn who were NOT blessed with big boobs but STILL chose to stay real - like Aurora Snow, Brianna Love (OMFG, you're so hot!!), Crissy Moon, Faith Leon, Ginger Lynn, Jynx Maze, Katja Kassin, Kristina Rose (OMFG again!!), Kymber Troy, Lauren Phoenix, Mary Anne, Mayara Rodrigues, Monica Santhiago, Monica Sweetheart, Natalie Norton, Naomi, Peaches, Sandra Romain, Sarah Twain, Sasha Grey, Tamiry Chiavari, Taylor Rain, Trisha Rey - and I know I've omitted some amazing women! To me, pretty much ALL natural boob sizes are beautiful, from AA all the way up to DD and beyond. God Bless the women with enough sense and confidence to realize that they're gorgeous just the way they are.
Anyway, I feel better after that, both after venting, and after listing some of the women who make porn great and help me keep my faith in...well - Life, the Universe, and Everything, I suppose!
The main reason I'm "in a mood" (as my Southern Mom often put it), is lack of sex! It's been three whole days since my wife and I have hooked up, and I haven't had any solo orgasms in that time, either. I know to many who'll read this (if many read this at all), 3 days is nothing, but to us, with no kids and relatively sane schedules, it's a LONG time. Oh, well, this too shall pass and all will be well again soon. It's way past my bedtime, so nighty night.
Now that that's out of the way...
I love porn, don't get me wrong. But SO much about porn, and porn stars, is just plain STUPID. I know it can't be easy thinking up new ideas for porn scenes and titles. I also know that a lot of the things about today's porn that make me cringe - ridiculous enhancements (more on that in a minute), ridiculous body hair-less-ness, and disgusting things like incest porn - are huge turn-ons for other people.
So maybe I'm irritated with other people for having disgusting tastes. And as a fart fetishist, who also enjoys bondage, domination, submission, and being pegged, I realize the utter absurdity of my being disgusted by other people's tastes. I mean, if I don't like it - don't watch, right? And I don't, and really, it's all good as long as everything's consensual and safe and sane (etc). But Sartre was right when he said that hell is other people. Sometimes, they just get on my nerves and I have to vent. So I did. Thanks for listening, if you did - and a big FUCK YOU otherwise! (I keed, I keed!)
The body enhancements thing really gets on my nerves, especially because so many of the women who've deformed themselves in the name of "sexy" were so much sexier before than after. I'm talking about you, Rebeca Linares, Aletta Ocean and Black Angelika (among dozens of others).
Although...I'm pretty sure they didn't get fake boobs, bee-sting lips and/or ass implants (EWWWWWWW!!!!) to feel sexier; I'm sure they did these things to MAKE MORE MONEY.
I'm guessing most of the decisions porn stars make are made for financial reasons. After all, at the end of the day, these women (and men) are whores. And I don't mean that to be derogatory, just descriptive. They have sex for money. Hell, in a capitalist society, we're ALL whores in one way or another, aren't we? But be that as it may, I don't think I'll ever buy - or even watch for free - any porn by stars with ass implants, and I always prefer the pre-enhanced scenes from stars I love. (As I've said before, with only rare exceptions, female porn stars do their best work earlier in their careers, anyway).
So a special shout out of love and respect to all the fine porn stars who've chosen to keep their natural bodies, including those, like the super fine Annette Schwarz and Holly Michaels (among many others) who were blessed with big, beautiful boobs - but more especially to the super fine women of porn who were NOT blessed with big boobs but STILL chose to stay real - like Aurora Snow, Brianna Love (OMFG, you're so hot!!), Crissy Moon, Faith Leon, Ginger Lynn, Jynx Maze, Katja Kassin, Kristina Rose (OMFG again!!), Kymber Troy, Lauren Phoenix, Mary Anne, Mayara Rodrigues, Monica Santhiago, Monica Sweetheart, Natalie Norton, Naomi, Peaches, Sandra Romain, Sarah Twain, Sasha Grey, Tamiry Chiavari, Taylor Rain, Trisha Rey - and I know I've omitted some amazing women! To me, pretty much ALL natural boob sizes are beautiful, from AA all the way up to DD and beyond. God Bless the women with enough sense and confidence to realize that they're gorgeous just the way they are.
Anyway, I feel better after that, both after venting, and after listing some of the women who make porn great and help me keep my faith in...well - Life, the Universe, and Everything, I suppose!
The main reason I'm "in a mood" (as my Southern Mom often put it), is lack of sex! It's been three whole days since my wife and I have hooked up, and I haven't had any solo orgasms in that time, either. I know to many who'll read this (if many read this at all), 3 days is nothing, but to us, with no kids and relatively sane schedules, it's a LONG time. Oh, well, this too shall pass and all will be well again soon. It's way past my bedtime, so nighty night.
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
Gonna have to face it - I'm addicted to porn
I don't think there's any doubt. I download 10 or more scenes in an average day, even though I watch just a couple of them (if any) when I masturbate. I do look at porn sometimes if I want to have sex with my wife but I'm not horny, but again, that's usually just a scene, or short snippets from a few scenes.
I like to feel like I have great taste in porn, and that I'm up to date on what's going on. I have a lot of favorite porn stars, from yesterday and today, and I like to collect their best (i.e, sluttiest) scenes. Right now, I'm searching for scenes from Monica Sweetheart, Sarah Vandella, Phoenix Marie, Kelly Devine, Chanel Preston, Black Angelika, Holly Michaels, Jennifer White, Tiffany Mynx, Katja Kassin, Angel Dark, Kagney Linn Karter, Bree Olson, Rebeca Linares, Gauge, Bobbi Starr, Sandra Romain, Kissy Kapri, Rita Faltoyano, Ashley Long, Alexis Texas, Sophie Dee, Velicity Von, Nika Noire, Annette Schwarz, Cathy Heaven, and Melissa Lauren. Among others!
I like well-built sluts! Well, I guess they're really whores, not sluts per se, but whatever. I like porn stars with real, curvy bodies, who really like sex. Many of my favorites are into both vanilla, and kinky, porn. For example, Sophie Dee is AMAZING. She does anal, swallows - AND sit on guy's faces, busts their balls, and fucks guys with strap-ons. Whatever she does, she seems to enjoy doing. And that makes me enjoy watching her do it!
The addiction part is what worries me. I've been spending WAY too much time "researching", searching for, and downloading scenes from my many favorite porn stars, hours each day, and often, it stops me from doing other things. I haven't been exercising enough lately, for one. Even this blog has suffered, because when I'm downloading porn, it makes Blogger take too long to load. I decided to post this in between downloads. After I finish, I'm going to do some overdue software updates, restart the computer, and then get back to work. And of course, I'll get back to downloading, too.
I usually have one download going at a time during the workday, two if my wife's not also working from home. At night, when neither of us is using the computer, I often have three downloads going at once.
And now that I'm looking at it, I'm wondering WHY. Obviously, I love porn, and I love to have it around to get me horny, and/or to get me off when my wife's not in the mood, or it's that time of the month, etc. And I love to have enough variety so there's always something new to watch. But do I really need multiple TERABYTES of it?!? I guess it's not a big deal. It doesn't interfere with my work (much) or my social life (much), and it definitely doesn't stop my wife and me from having mind-blowing sex several times a week. I'm not going blind, or going broke, from it. Which is good, because I don't see myself stopping anytime soon!
Speaking of mind-blowing sex with my wife... we've had sex several times since the last entry. If I recall correctly, she's given me two blowjobs (and she kissed the cum into my mouth after one of those), I've fucked her once (I came inside her in the "lazy doggy" position), and yesterday morning, I came with my tongue up her ass and my dick between her feet. After I finished cumming on her feet, I licked up the cum. Awesome.
Maybe best of all, three days ago, I came the same way - but that day she farted in my face three times! We didn't hook up this morning, but maybe we will tonight. She's way overdue for "her turn" dominating - but I may take charge instead!
I just came inside a masturbation sleeve before writing this, sniffing a fragrant pair of her panties and sucking on Vixskin Johnny, Vixskin Goodfella, Softskin Elvis - and the one that got me off, Vixskin Outlaw. That's the biggest, blackest cock in my collection. I briefly imagined my wife "making" me suck a real cock just like it and then, even more briefly, I imagined my wife having sex with a real cock just like it. And then, I sniffed her panties again and came in the masturbation sleeve. As usual with fantasies like that, I didn't feel completely wonderful about it afterwards. But fortunately, it's just a fantasy and the reality is truly wonderful!
And now, back to the sluts! :)
I like to feel like I have great taste in porn, and that I'm up to date on what's going on. I have a lot of favorite porn stars, from yesterday and today, and I like to collect their best (i.e, sluttiest) scenes. Right now, I'm searching for scenes from Monica Sweetheart, Sarah Vandella, Phoenix Marie, Kelly Devine, Chanel Preston, Black Angelika, Holly Michaels, Jennifer White, Tiffany Mynx, Katja Kassin, Angel Dark, Kagney Linn Karter, Bree Olson, Rebeca Linares, Gauge, Bobbi Starr, Sandra Romain, Kissy Kapri, Rita Faltoyano, Ashley Long, Alexis Texas, Sophie Dee, Velicity Von, Nika Noire, Annette Schwarz, Cathy Heaven, and Melissa Lauren. Among others!
I like well-built sluts! Well, I guess they're really whores, not sluts per se, but whatever. I like porn stars with real, curvy bodies, who really like sex. Many of my favorites are into both vanilla, and kinky, porn. For example, Sophie Dee is AMAZING. She does anal, swallows - AND sit on guy's faces, busts their balls, and fucks guys with strap-ons. Whatever she does, she seems to enjoy doing. And that makes me enjoy watching her do it!
The addiction part is what worries me. I've been spending WAY too much time "researching", searching for, and downloading scenes from my many favorite porn stars, hours each day, and often, it stops me from doing other things. I haven't been exercising enough lately, for one. Even this blog has suffered, because when I'm downloading porn, it makes Blogger take too long to load. I decided to post this in between downloads. After I finish, I'm going to do some overdue software updates, restart the computer, and then get back to work. And of course, I'll get back to downloading, too.
I usually have one download going at a time during the workday, two if my wife's not also working from home. At night, when neither of us is using the computer, I often have three downloads going at once.
And now that I'm looking at it, I'm wondering WHY. Obviously, I love porn, and I love to have it around to get me horny, and/or to get me off when my wife's not in the mood, or it's that time of the month, etc. And I love to have enough variety so there's always something new to watch. But do I really need multiple TERABYTES of it?!? I guess it's not a big deal. It doesn't interfere with my work (much) or my social life (much), and it definitely doesn't stop my wife and me from having mind-blowing sex several times a week. I'm not going blind, or going broke, from it. Which is good, because I don't see myself stopping anytime soon!
Speaking of mind-blowing sex with my wife... we've had sex several times since the last entry. If I recall correctly, she's given me two blowjobs (and she kissed the cum into my mouth after one of those), I've fucked her once (I came inside her in the "lazy doggy" position), and yesterday morning, I came with my tongue up her ass and my dick between her feet. After I finished cumming on her feet, I licked up the cum. Awesome.
Maybe best of all, three days ago, I came the same way - but that day she farted in my face three times! We didn't hook up this morning, but maybe we will tonight. She's way overdue for "her turn" dominating - but I may take charge instead!
I just came inside a masturbation sleeve before writing this, sniffing a fragrant pair of her panties and sucking on Vixskin Johnny, Vixskin Goodfella, Softskin Elvis - and the one that got me off, Vixskin Outlaw. That's the biggest, blackest cock in my collection. I briefly imagined my wife "making" me suck a real cock just like it and then, even more briefly, I imagined my wife having sex with a real cock just like it. And then, I sniffed her panties again and came in the masturbation sleeve. As usual with fantasies like that, I didn't feel completely wonderful about it afterwards. But fortunately, it's just a fantasy and the reality is truly wonderful!
And now, back to the sluts! :)
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Continuing to Kick ASS
Life is better than I ever thought possible!
Since my last entry, I've dominated my wife 3 times, and she's swallowed my cum TWICE! This after over a decade of refusing to swallow at all.
One of the two times was tonight, after a stellar "slave" blowjob. Maybe it's the collar... I bought a lovely steel collar a couple of years ago, intending it for myself. It was incredibly inexpensive - and it didn't fit my big neck! But I realized last week that it would be a perfect fit for my wife, and this evening, I put it around her neck and was thrilled to find it fit exactly right. She likes it, and it seemed to make her feel submissive. I've never gotten such a worshipful blowjob! I watched her the whole time, and directed the action. It ended with my cumming in her mouth and her swallowing without hesitation.
Wow!!!
This was a very straightforward session, with almost nothing but oral submission. I did smack her around a little with the leather slapper, when she resisted my command to let her hair down. But mostly it was just my dominant cock in her submissive mouth, ending with her digesting my seed. Yes!
The first time she swallowed, which was a couple of weeks ago, the session was a bit longer and more involved. I had her put on a skimpy outfit and dance for me, then I whipped her ass and back (marks!), lubed up her ass, and used some anal toys on her. I wanted to plug her ass with the Tantus Ryder, and for her to have that up her ass while she blew me, but that plug was just a little too big. I tried a smaller plug, but it kept falling out. Oh, well.
I've felt more fulfilled than I can ever remember since the first time she swallowed. It's hard for her to understand, but I just feel completely accepted and desired by her. Maybe it's silly, but it's also REAL. I hope she keeps on swallowing.
I didn't think she ever would, and I was OK with that. For the past several months, every time I've dominated her, I've offered her the choice of swallowing, or receiving anal. Until a few weeks ago, she always chose anal. Then, unexpectedly, one night she chose to swallow. And then, when I came in her mouth, she spat it out. Which SUCKED.
The next couple of times, she chose anal, which was awesome. Two weeks ago, she chose swallowing again - and I was prepared. I told her if she didn't follow through and actually swallow, I would get to dominate her again in three days. And that's why she swallowed! Hey, whatever works, right?
She was supposed to dominate me this past weekend, but she was too tired. Lately, I've been feeling so dominant that I didn't mind. I will offer myself to her again this weekend, and I have a feeling she'll dominate me!
The most dominant things she's done lately are to fart in my face a couple of times, to have me cum while kissing her ass a couple of times - and to kiss my cum into my mouth for swallowing several times! That's another thing I didn't think she'd ever do again, but now it's becoming a regular thing, and I fucking LOVE it!!
Ridiculously, I've also been downloading more porn than ever before. I'm running out of space on my "porn drive". I don't even know WHY I keep doing it. I guess because it's free, and because there's more of what I like (gorgeous women receiving anal and swallowing, femdom, etc.) available than ever before.
But sex with my wife is so amazing that I've hardly been masturbating at all, and when I do, I usually just sniff a recently-worn pair of her panties and/or suck on a realistic dildo while I fuck a masturbation sleeve. I have been using porn to get hard before approaching my wife for sex, but I already have gigs and gigs of "stiffening" material. I really don't need more, but still I keep adding a dozen or so scenes to my collection ever day, usually of my favorite stars doing my favorite things. Oh, well.
I deactivated both my profiles on the bdsm social site. I have zero interest in involving anyone else in our sex life. Even fantasizing about it has lost its zing. I married the right woman, and I hope she feels the same about me!
And now, I'm off to bed with her. Life is perfect, and I'm gratefully blissed out. Goodnight!
Since my last entry, I've dominated my wife 3 times, and she's swallowed my cum TWICE! This after over a decade of refusing to swallow at all.
One of the two times was tonight, after a stellar "slave" blowjob. Maybe it's the collar... I bought a lovely steel collar a couple of years ago, intending it for myself. It was incredibly inexpensive - and it didn't fit my big neck! But I realized last week that it would be a perfect fit for my wife, and this evening, I put it around her neck and was thrilled to find it fit exactly right. She likes it, and it seemed to make her feel submissive. I've never gotten such a worshipful blowjob! I watched her the whole time, and directed the action. It ended with my cumming in her mouth and her swallowing without hesitation.
Wow!!!
This was a very straightforward session, with almost nothing but oral submission. I did smack her around a little with the leather slapper, when she resisted my command to let her hair down. But mostly it was just my dominant cock in her submissive mouth, ending with her digesting my seed. Yes!
The first time she swallowed, which was a couple of weeks ago, the session was a bit longer and more involved. I had her put on a skimpy outfit and dance for me, then I whipped her ass and back (marks!), lubed up her ass, and used some anal toys on her. I wanted to plug her ass with the Tantus Ryder, and for her to have that up her ass while she blew me, but that plug was just a little too big. I tried a smaller plug, but it kept falling out. Oh, well.
I've felt more fulfilled than I can ever remember since the first time she swallowed. It's hard for her to understand, but I just feel completely accepted and desired by her. Maybe it's silly, but it's also REAL. I hope she keeps on swallowing.
I didn't think she ever would, and I was OK with that. For the past several months, every time I've dominated her, I've offered her the choice of swallowing, or receiving anal. Until a few weeks ago, she always chose anal. Then, unexpectedly, one night she chose to swallow. And then, when I came in her mouth, she spat it out. Which SUCKED.
The next couple of times, she chose anal, which was awesome. Two weeks ago, she chose swallowing again - and I was prepared. I told her if she didn't follow through and actually swallow, I would get to dominate her again in three days. And that's why she swallowed! Hey, whatever works, right?
She was supposed to dominate me this past weekend, but she was too tired. Lately, I've been feeling so dominant that I didn't mind. I will offer myself to her again this weekend, and I have a feeling she'll dominate me!
The most dominant things she's done lately are to fart in my face a couple of times, to have me cum while kissing her ass a couple of times - and to kiss my cum into my mouth for swallowing several times! That's another thing I didn't think she'd ever do again, but now it's becoming a regular thing, and I fucking LOVE it!!
Ridiculously, I've also been downloading more porn than ever before. I'm running out of space on my "porn drive". I don't even know WHY I keep doing it. I guess because it's free, and because there's more of what I like (gorgeous women receiving anal and swallowing, femdom, etc.) available than ever before.
But sex with my wife is so amazing that I've hardly been masturbating at all, and when I do, I usually just sniff a recently-worn pair of her panties and/or suck on a realistic dildo while I fuck a masturbation sleeve. I have been using porn to get hard before approaching my wife for sex, but I already have gigs and gigs of "stiffening" material. I really don't need more, but still I keep adding a dozen or so scenes to my collection ever day, usually of my favorite stars doing my favorite things. Oh, well.
I deactivated both my profiles on the bdsm social site. I have zero interest in involving anyone else in our sex life. Even fantasizing about it has lost its zing. I married the right woman, and I hope she feels the same about me!
And now, I'm off to bed with her. Life is perfect, and I'm gratefully blissed out. Goodnight!
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