I used to be hot.
Twenty years ago, I was all sinewy and had good hair. I was masculine, as I am now, but somehow my masculinity was more attractive. I still have a great cock, which gets plenty of positive attention, so it would be ridiculous to complain.
But it would be awesome to experience big cocks in my throat and massive cum loads in my mouth (and stomach).
Sadly, I'm not what most guys looking online for a same sex blowjob are looking for. I give amazing head. I can be VERY submissive. But I'm an average guy, not hot like I used to be.
I don't get horny when I see myself in the mirror now. I think instead about what needs to change, and how many months of gym work and sensible eating it would take to make the changes. And then I silently sigh as I realize that even if I do all that, I would still have to do something about my hair (what's left of it) and then there's the whole body hair thing. Back in the day, I used Nair on my ass and back; no way would I do that now. My wife wouldn't like it!
Anyway, but I know there are still guys out there in the surrounding area who I could have a lot of fun with. Somewhere, maybe just a neighborhood or a town away, is an alpha male, young and tall with a big dick, who would love to get a blowjob from an older beta male, maybe while watching porn. Maybe he'd like to talk shit to me, boss me around, or otherwise torment me. I like to imagine him taking a long time to cum, and finally shooting a huge load into my mouth with no warning!
Part of me wants it just to stay a fantasy, a temporary (and now fading) fantasy, in the background between my wife and me.
And part of me wants to kneel at the Alpha's feet, and open my mouth to receive His superior Cock, and eventually, inevitably, His superior Sperm. To go home with a sore mouth and throat, and to put off washing the taste out of my mouth as long as possible.
I will keep looking. I may even post my own ad. Will I ever act on it?
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